Marriage, as an institution, has been shaped by the needs and realities of human societies across centuries. Traditional vows were crafted in a world where life was unpredictable, healthcare was a privilege, and economic survival often depended on a lifelong partnership. They reflected the uncertainties of an era when sickness, financial hardship, and old age could leave individuals vulnerable, making marriage a necessary anchor for stability and support.
But today, we live in a world where healthcare is a basic right, where pensions and social security exist, where old age homes provide care, and where people have access to resources that were unimaginable just a century ago. Marriage, once a contract of survival, is now more of a conscious, personal choice—a commitment to companionship rather than necessity.
If our society has changed, shouldn’t our vows change too?
Imagine a world where marriage vows are not about endurance and obligation, but about conscious companionship and growth. Instead of clinging to promises that may not reflect the realities of human nature, what if we embraced vows that honored change as much as commitment? What if we recognized that relationships evolve, and parting ways could be just as beautiful as staying together?
Here’s what a modern marriage vow could look like:
“I’m gonna marry you now because you seem like such a great person—and so am I. And someday, you may not be so, and someday, I may not be so. Not because we have become bad, but because we are humans. We change for reasons unseen, we want to experience different things, we want to live in different places, or we just want to be alone. And that’s okay.
The world is vast and beautiful, and we never know how our interactions with it will shape us. Maybe one day, you’ll want something different, or maybe I will. Maybe we’ll grow apart, not out of failure, but out of natural evolution. And if that happens, we will honor it.
If we stay together, it will be because we choose to—actively, consciously—every single day. Not out of obligation, not because of outdated traditions, but because being together still feels right. If we part ways, we will do so in celebration, just as we are celebrating this union today, knowing that we have shared something wonderful and meaningful.
If you get lazy or I get lazy, there’s nothing wrong with that, because being lazy is also an important and beautiful experience of life—when done beautifully. If we put on weight, you put on weight, and we become less attractive to each other, that’s okay. Nothing to fear—let’s just go along with it. If we put on weight, it will surely be over some delicious food, and that’s something to cherish. Meanwhile, while we are together, I will make every effort to make you happy, to make our lives richer, without unnecessarily forcing myself into something that doesn’t feel right. And if we develop in different directions, we will recognize that as the natural course of life.
Because things change, humans change. And that’s the beauty of life. Let’s cherish it—until death do us part, or life do us part, because it is just so beautifully unpredictable.”
This is a marriage vow that embraces modernity. It acknowledges the unpredictability of life, the fluid nature of human relationships, and the fact that love and commitment are choices made in the present, not obligations tied to permanence.
The evolution of marriage vows is not a rejection of commitment, but an evolution toward honesty. If we, as a civilization, continue to progress, maybe one day, these vows will be the norm—not as a cynical acceptance of impermanence, but as a deeper, more authentic appreciation of love in all its transient beauty.
Neomodern 